Some days it feels like I am, and we all are, just waiting to die
Like there is no meaning to anything we do and nothing we ever do will be great
And everyday I think of my own death
Will I be scared?
Will I know?
What will I see when I leave this plane?
Is death the end? Will it go black?
Can I comprehend now the idea of non-existence?
Of no longer being able to comprehend?
What comes next?
And some days, the good days, I am a determined life force who will not be put down
I will not collapse, and wallow the unknown
I will not kneel at a shrine of my past failures and beg reprieve from the torment of finality
Some days I will do everything and the most and I will show myself what it means to be alive.
@ruthnineke February 21, 2018