Only This

A Poem by Ruth Nineke

 

Your touch is my fixture,
the warm gold
poured between
my life long cracks,
an ancient remedy
arrived
to hold me
together, anew
and more beautiful
than I could ever become on my own

When you touch me
I can feel everything
I’ve waited so long for,
my metamorphosis,
hidden
and elusive
for years, now
nearly revealed,
and the pleasure you layer through me,
with your grip
tight around me,
is laced in pain,
a sweet torture
that plays along the valley
of my fears
that if I should cross
the veil I won’t ever be the same
and the life I know,
the person I thought I was
will disappear
forever
and I won’t be able to go back
again

And yet I surrender
in these moments to your eyes
and mouth,
your voice and your desire,
to which I am bound
beneath your will
and I give myself away not because
I cannot resist but
because I want what
you want.

I dissolve at your kiss,
softened and emotional,
so impressionable in your presence,
I want only this:
You beside me,
you to guide me,
your beautiful monstrous bones
to bite me,
the melodic tone of your language
of love
glowing richly
through every vein inside of me,
lighting up
both
my core and my crown,
as you promise so sweetly
that you don’t want to hurt me.

And I think I believe it,
I think that you mean it,
when I drink from your cup,
that this
is what you need to be freed,
and that I am the only one
who could
truly unseal
the magnificent power
which lives
inside of your touch.

 


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